


Rain In Dotonburi

by AmelieofK



Category: iKON (Korea Band)
Genre: Fluff and Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-07
Updated: 2020-12-07
Packaged: 2021-03-10 00:00:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,451
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27935065
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AmelieofK/pseuds/AmelieofK
Summary: Four years had passed since Hanbin's departure and the disbandment of iKON but for Yunhyeong, the rain in Dotonburi were a reminder of a love he had kept burning even under the showers of this sacred place.
Relationships: Kim Hanbin | B.I/Song Yunhyeong
Comments: 12
Kudos: 17





	Rain In Dotonburi

**Author's Note:**

> Had this in my drafts for months now. Glad I managed to finish it.

Of course it was different. It had felt different for the past four years without Hanbin in his life. He did everything he could think of trying so hard not to forget about Hanbin because Hanbin was definitely not someone whom he could easily dismiss from his mind.

Or his heart, for that matter.

Hanbin who was younger than him, much more talented than him. Hanbin who was merciless in the studio, seemingly mature and demanding when it came to his expectations as a producer, a music genius. Hanbin, who was immature and childish outside of it.

Hanbin who was his leader, his child and his lover all rolled into this one entity; always mysterious and fascinated him.

He had loved and accepted all that Hanbin is, even when Hanbin was wrenched away from him so callously.

Their irrevocable loss; its ensuing anger and the culminating despair at the thought that they might never reunite as seven. The hurt and the anguish. Everything that each member had to go through, Yunhyeong felt it all, times two. 

He stored all the dark moments; pickled into a sour ball of fury and abject hate. He kept it within him, churning it, very much like the way he tossed and turned into the covers on his bed at the dorm. The dorm, which was almost always silent on any given day, was now made even emptier and lonely without the presence of the man he love with all his heart.

Chanwoo would have said he was exaggerating, of course. It was not like Hanbin was always in the dorm anyway, the boy would have added, if Yunhyeong had professed this aloud. His real home was the studio and when he had been served the ejection notice quite suddenly from his comfort zone, Yunhyeong had been the first to search for him, relentlessly, like a man who had lost his soul and dearly needed it back for salvation. 

He had to remain strong for everyone. He had to embrace the fact that Hanbin wanted the team to continue chasing after their dreams carrying the torch of his will, no matter how much they protested angrily and in frustration. He had to take that sour ball that was a culmination of all his unhappiness and turned it into something positive; the way he always did in the face of judgement and obstacles.

The way his parents had raised him.

For a number of years, it worked, but it was not perfect. He was not perfect, of course. And his feelings for Hanbin back then had been at its highest peak, never to come down from its summit even after all these years.

Without the freedom to acknowledge his emotions, Yunhyeong had to experience heartbreak under a staggering silence and the only thing he had to cope with were memories which remained fresh as if he was still living in them. Even after they disbanded and left the agency, carving their own successful, solo careers, Yunhyeong’s memories of Hanbin, who had been his and whom he had belonged to in return, remained ever clear.

The way Hanbin would stumble into his room by accident, because he had been too tired to even realise where he was going. Hanbin mumbling in his sleep about rhythms and melodies as if he made music even while he slept. Yunhyeong would lie beside him, tucking the covers over their tired bodies, falling asleep to the sound of Hanbin humming or reciting a line or mumbling lyrics which would probably materialised in one of his demos a few weeks or months down the road. Yunhyeong knew all the fans loved Hanbin's demos. Yunhyeong being the only exception to the rule. Not because of anything else, but only because Hanbin always sounded so tired in them.

Still, it was wide awake and alert Hanbin that Yunhyeong looked forward to, all the time. The one that Yunhyeong always welcomed with ready, willing arms.

Hanbin when he was lucid would walk into Yunhyeong’s room casually, locking the door, taking whatever it was Yunhyeong was holding in his hands; toothbrush or his mallet when he was into leather making back then, and putting it gently aside, as if he had all the time in the world. Hanbin leading Yunhyeong to the bed, undressing him unhurriedly, lips tracing that jawline, appraising his clavicles; gently and with such tenderness so that Yunhyeong could only remained standing rooted to the spot where he was, caught in the sort of fascination reserved only for people frolicking in the ecstasy of love.

Yunhyeong sometimes whimpering for more, mostly moaning softly in unmatched desire as Hanbin whispered his name in a litany of chants, kissing every part of him with ardent proclamation as if Yunhyeong existed only to provide him respite and pleasure. A role Yunhyeong knew he was destined to take.

The memory of both these Hanbins would inevitably force him to shed tears into his pillows at night when silence pervades the empty space that was left in his heart when Hanbin had been forced to leave.

“How long do you think we should do this?” Hanbin had asked once, after a session which left them gasping heavily into a heap on the bed, both their lips still echoing each other’s names respectively. Yunhyeong cleaning Hanbin and himself with a towel, before chucking it to the laundry basket then quickly folding the thick blankets over their spent bodies, as Hanbin embraced him from behind for warmth and they both settled quietly to sleep. Moments when the thought of being separated was an impossibility.

Yunhyeong loved this Hanbin the most. The introspective, reflective Hanbin that only he had the privilege to be with and listen to.

“Do what?” Yunhyeong asked him, eyes closed tightly, feeling all the happiness in the world envelope him in utter decadence.

“This.” Hanbin shook his arm slightly. “Tours, concerts, chasing dreams, making love discreetly in the dorm and hotel rooms.” Hanbin muttered, breath warm against the side of Yunhyeong’s smooth cheek.

“As long as you want to.” Yunhyeong had whispered right back, allowing the leisure of Hanbin’s drawl lull him to sleep.

“But what if it ends?” Hanbin piped, as if in premonition of all the dreadful things that would avalanche over everything they had worked so hard for, since the last four years or so.

“ _Kapjaegi_? Why are you talking in this manner so suddenly?” Yunhyeong asked, eyes open wide and turning to glare at Hanbin, feeling outraged that such a thought should seep into this sliver of paradise they had built for themselves. Hanbin’s eyes were closed, but there was an indulgent smile spread across his pink lips, soft like a cushion and just the sight of that calmed Yunhyeong down a little.

“Ah…why do you sound like an _ahjussi_ when you get upset? It’s such a turn-off.” Hanbin sighed in that manner Yunhyeong had become so accustomed to. That sigh which told Yunhyeong immediately that Hanbin was just teasing him.

“You started it.” Yunhyeong complained now, pouting. At the same time, he could not help admiring those outstanding features on Hanbin’s visage; the way his lids were shaped like petals framed by curled lashes, that majestic nose and the Cupid’s bow of his lips, pink like roses.

“ _Arasseo, arasseo…mian-he_.” Hanbin muttered raspily, tucking Yunhyeong’s head under his chin, a signal that they should both shut up and get some well-deserved rest.

~~~~~

Four years later, a duration which included their group's disbandment, Yunhyeong found himself back here in Dotonbori, trawling through the streets after a showcase for his first solo album. He had become accustomed to fans stopping him by now, asking for an autograph or if they were brave enough, a selfie. It was raining and of course, the last time he was here, it had been rainy too. Hanbin had been with him the last time he was here, as well.

Had it been that long?

They had come here for sushi a few times, sometimes just the two of them and sometimes with other members. Yunhyeong remembered paying for it once, because they had been so happy that night, having dinner with Donghyuk and all the staff, happy as a lark, as if they were dating openly. Hanbin had even been in his vlog, teasing and calling him out like some weird, drunken homeless man. 

Yunhyeong smiled sadly in the passing of this clear memory, realising that along with the rain and the memories, there were also, predictably, tears in his eyes.

It became almost a rite of passage that missing Hanbin also meant missing the other members. They would have teased him for being so sentimental, for having such romantic notions over rain, sushi and Hanbin. Yet it was ironic that in all this sadness which washed over him, Yunhyeong truly missed the days when they were on tours or vacations together, filming, bantering and getting in each other’s hair.

It was crazy of course, to miss something which had beaten their bodies and minds, time and time again. All those years away from their families with only each other to depend on, held by a promise which had bonded them into a brotherhood. How he had always been afraid that they would break apart constantly during the early days when nothing had been set in stone and their fates hung in the balance. Of nights, sleeping at the lounge of a different airports almost every other week because of tours and competitions. Schedules filled to the brim, sleeping in Japan and waking up in China.

Yet he did. He missed all of it.

Even with Hanbin gone at some point during that journey, Yunhyeong missed those days when Hanbin specifically lectured Yunhyeong about his bad habit of camera hogging, groaned loudly over his _ahbeoji_ jokes and the way he was smothering everyone about keeping their rooms tidy and neat. He knew it was Hanbin’s way of keeping everything else between them under wraps so he would just grinned and gaze at Hanbin in hapless resignation. Back at the dorm, he would remain the only one waiting for Hanbin, if in case he returned from the studio hungry, or just in need for a cup of warm chocolate milk. Yunhyeong would always be there with a pack of health tonic or with a massager, because Hanbin was always creating for them tirelessly and therefore, deserved all of his attention.

They had promised, each of them, and Yunhyeong’s promises had all, but been entrenched towards Hanbin’s presence that losing Hanbin quite suddenly had made him lose his bearings for the longest while, even though he tried to put on a brave front for everyone's sake and trudged on.

The sushi place remained as it was. The old man had retired years ago, but his protege was just as good and skilful as he had been. Yunhyeong took his usual seat when he walked in to the place. He was not a regular but it felt familiar all the same. A place where memories of him and Hanbin had shared in happiness. The atmosphere, the ambience and the taste, all reeked of Hanbin to him.

He was the only customer today. Perhaps it was the rain.

He closed his eyes momentarily; remembering how he held the umbrella over Hanbin as that inner child in him began splashing his feet into small puddles creating tiny splashes and how Yunhyeong would complain aloud about getting his shoes wet, especially if he had the expensive ones on. Dotonburi was definitely theirs. Every kerb had their footsteps, their collective laughter and their love plastered all over it. Their place. 

“Are you ever going to eat?” The voice which broke into the sail of his memory was familiar. It had all the qualities of the languid drawl he had sorely missed in his life. Yunhyeong opened his eyes slowly, turning his head even slower in the direction of that voice. Yunhyeong was not sure if he was trapped in a memory or if this was actually happening, but it was definitely Hanbin sitting beside him. His face looked paler, the jaw thinner and a scruffy shadow under his chin and his hair, growing way past his nape.

“OH!” Yunhyeong cupped his mouth at this sudden, involuntary sound. It was a cry; of surprise, of pain set from a belated release and perhaps, disbelief?

It was really Hanbin. Hanbin sitting beside him, here in their sushi place, in Dotonburi.

“You, are a pretty hard man to find Song Yunhyeong. I had to call three different people before I hit the jackpot.” Hanbin exhaled, ordering sake in addition to the special platter. Yunhyeong blinked the tears that had culminated into a hot well along the rim of his eyes, slowly they begin to spill like rivulets down his cheeks. He was beyond words, his body reduced to quivers of a malady wrought from shock and very little else. Hanbin’s gaze finally rested on him. His eyes widened in surprise at Yunhyeong’s tears before those cheeks churn up into the swells of an incredulous smile. “Yunhyeong-ah, are you alright?” He asked, half-laughing as if they had not been separated a day since he left the dorm so suddenly four years ago.

It was classic Hanbin; pretend that nothing had happened, that not a day had passed since they last met. 

Yunhyeong stood up, unable to grapple with words that made any sense at all. He sidled against that wiry body sitting on the stool beside him, so familiar and warm, letting his head fall into that shoulder as the burden of his sorrows found its ultimate release. Hanbin placed an arm around Yunhyeong’s waist tightly, burying face into the top of that soft bounce of brown hair still permeating the same floral scent of Yunhyeong’s favourite shampoo. A scent he had held dear to his heart. 

Sushi, sake and the rekindling of a flame that never died. It really felt as if all those years melted away under its heat.

They walked hand in hand, under a shared umbrella, down the wet streets of Dotonburi, arms tangled because with the flight of sorrow, there was a sense of never wanting to let go and new memories forged.

“Where have you been all these years?” Yunhyeong finally found voice to the questions embedded in his heart.

“Searching for myself.” Hanbin exhaled. “I’m sorry it took so long.” He added and Yunhyeong swiped away at the tears, which had begun to accumulate again, threatening to burn his already puffy eyes. It was good that no one noticed them thanks to the rain. “I’m at the Four Seasons, just a block from here.” Hanbin stated and there was no question of whether Yunhyeong would follow him. They walked the rest of the way in meaningful silence.

Yunhyeong had barely gotten his jacket off and Hanbin was cupping his jaw, lips finding that familiar velvet taste of his Cherry Shine lip balm. Yunhyeong moaned softly, hands gently going under the jersey hoodie Hanbin wore and finding the soft, smooth chest he had run his hands over so many times in all the years they had been together. Hanbin had lost a bit of weight but his caresses, his kisses and his soft moans had not changed at all.

Yunhyeong began crying again as Hanbin entered him, causing the younger man to gaze down at him in alarm.

“I’m…sorry. It’s been awhile since…if I hurt you…” Hanbin explained, his winsome face filled with guilt. Yunhyeong quickly shook his head.

“No…it’s not that. I…I miss this. You in me. This feeling…of finding that missing piece of me again.” Yunhyeong sobbed, blinking his tears. They hugged each other tighter, meeting thrusts with eagerness that had no patience, embroiled in a pulsating mass of flesh, skin and all the lost years in between that neither felt the need to speak of. They became a complete puzzle which had been scattered all over and finally picked one by one, then assembled with each piece intact.

Yunhyeong was sitting on the couch, gazing out of the wall window, watching the rain in Dotonburi cascading down the glass fogging the city’s landscape when Hanbin finally emerged from the bathroom.

“Are you hungry? Should I order some food?” Hanbin asked as he wiped his face with the towel. Yunhyeong shook his head silently, opening his arms which had been wrapped in the thick covers of the bedsheets in a beckoning gesture and Hanbin flashed an incandescent smile as he huddled into the embrace he had deprived himself of for close to five years.

“How did you manage to find me?” Yunhyeong asked as Hanbin leaned into that familiar hug.

“Chanwoo.” Hanbin stated. “Junhoe told me to ask him. They were not sure of your schedule.” He added.

“Were they surprised by your call?” Yunhyeong asked curiously. Hanbin chuckled and nodded. 

“Jinhwan was. He thought I would not have his number in Jeju. He gave me Junhoe’s number.” Hanbin recalled. “I miss them.” He added.

“Me too. Any news from Bobby and Donghyuk in America?” Yunhyeong asked. Hanbin nodded.

“They are planning to return to Korea next month. They want to open a studio and they’ve roped me in to run it.” Hanbin informed Yunhyeong.

“Really?” Yunhyeong mulled. Hanbin nodded. “Will you do it?”

“I don’t know yet. I still have the label and the production company but it’s getting tiring. Plus, I found someone I want to marry and he’s a singer, always travelling.” He sighed aloud.

“Ya~are you talking about me?!” Yunhyeong cried angrily. Hanbin laughed.

“You didn’t even answer me. I said I found someone to marry and you’re more concerned about everything else that I talked about, but that.” Hanbin complained, gazing back at Yunhyeong. His gaze turned soft at the sight of Yunhyeong starting to cry once more. “ _Mian-he_ , _yeobo_. I should ask you properly, shouldn’t I?” Hanbin whispered, turning to face Yunhyeong on the couch. He had brought his hand up, fingers slowly unfurl to reveal his palm. In the centre of this open palm, Hanbin held up a tiny, Tiffany box. “Song Yunhyeong, will you marry me?”

“You went missing for four years only to come all the way to Dotonburi to ask me this? Were you expecting a yes so easily?” Yunhyeong was crying again, but he was also sulky at the same time, sniffling back tears and not wanting to look at Hanbin in the eye. His lips pouted as he regarded the rain outsidethe window once again.

“Did you think it was easy to keep myself away from you while you were under the agency? I did everything I could to protect you and everyone else. You know that, don’t you?” Hanbin moved closer, his other hand cupping Yunhyeong’s jaw so he could turn it to face him resolutely.Yunhyeong narrowed his eyes, unconvinced. Hanbin urged him to take the box. “Open it.” Yunhyeong gently plucked the box from Hanbin’s palm and uncased it.

The diamond encrusted silver band shimmered in the semi-darkness of the room. Yunhyeong gasped at its thickness and the size of the diamonds around it. It was obviously custom-made and too beautiful to be anything but real.

“Hanbin? You’re not…joking. You’re really proposing to me?” It finally dawned on Yunhyeong. Hanbin nodded affirmatively.

“There never was a moment when I wanted to end what we had back then. Never. I waited as you have. I know I should have said something, but I didn’t know how long it would have taken for things to settle down and be as peaceful as they are now.” Hanbin explained. Hanbin had taken the ring from Yunhyeong, turning it between his thumb and forefinger, bringing it closer so Yunhyeong could see the letters engraved into the inner circle of the band; _KH ♡ SY_. Yunhyeong covered his mouth, unable to believe that just hours ago, he was almost ready to succumb to heartbreak and all its devastation at the thought of one man and yet now, this same man had managed to catch him before he shattered into a million pieces. “I love you. Always have. Always will.” Hanbin exhaled, sheathing the ring into Yunhyeong’s third finger with reverence, his eyes, translucent and lucid with effervescent joy.

Yunhyeong found himself in that warm embrace, the years between them that had been a chasm of loneliness suddenly closed forever, now only filled with tangible happiness and love which he knew held more meaning for the both of them.

“I know. I love you too,” Yunhyeong answered what had always been engraved in his heart.

**END**


End file.
